he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
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gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
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You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
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