i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
