About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
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