SEEEEXXX PLEASE
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
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Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
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