Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
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