As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Randomize
