I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
