My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
Randomize