remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
They took my balls.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize