covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
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