Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Randomize
