True but thats because hes a fetus.
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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