Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
Randomize
