yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Boobs speak an international language.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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