I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
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