Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
