It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
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