how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
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