My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
