I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
Randomize
