Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
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