even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize