I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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