The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize
