i may or may not be watching the land before time
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
You've changed since you got that strap on
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
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