Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
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