You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
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