evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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