Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
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