: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
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