I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
