dear santa what can i do with your candy cane?
oh god the rape fog is back!
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Randomize
