I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
Randomize