Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
