Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
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