Fuck u you updated twitter but didn't answer my text
I know you're alive
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Randomize