do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
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She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
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Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
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