Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
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Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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