It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Randomize
