I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
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I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
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If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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