were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Randomize
