It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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