roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Randomize
