boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize