Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
