got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
pop tarts are not kleenex
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Damn victory sex feels great
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