haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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