Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
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