I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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