your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
and she was petting her beer can
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
They took my balls.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
