Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
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